Black tiger cubs

Having become seriosly embarrassed at the thought of people from work reading this blog, I thought I'd better write about something less teenagerish.

Lately in the blogosphere there has been a trend of talking about depression. And it's something I greatly support. You could call it a passion of mine.

I've suffered from clinical depression from between 5 and 10 years, depending on which specialist you listen to. My psychiartist also thinks I have a range of abnormal disorders, most of which I laugh about. To anyone who knows me, I'm not completely normal, but I don't think anyone is.
Everyone's experience of depression is different, and mine has been convoluted by the years in which I experienced it. For a long time I completely ignored it - I was just growing up. It hasn't been until the past two years that it clicked that most teenagers don't attempt suicide.
I hide it a lot. Mainly because I don't think I deserve any attention because of it. It's not what controls my personality, and I have suffered far less than some people. Which creates an interesting conundrum when I talk about it. I got really sick over the past year (year 12, my last year of high school), which made it extra hard. I applied for special consideration, but I'm still not sure if I deserve it. I think I slacked off during year 12, and I don't feel reasonable blaming an illness for my less than expected marks.

However, it has given me a really good impetus for the rest of my life. I want to help cure depression. I hate what I've been through, and so plan to study psychology so no one else has to go through it. I understand that nothing like that is simple, but I believe greater awareness could help a lot. Pierre the yarn snob started a mission relating to knitting and depression (really bad description, sorry!!), and I think it's important to share that message. One of the things I've learnt through talking to friends going through a hard time is that sometimes you just need to understand that someone else has gone/is going through it.
For the interested - my favourite website on the topic is reachout
and I'm also going to check out headspace over the next few days.

So that was my black tiger cubs. I've always been a feline person, and laying in bed thinking last night about the post - I think that black tiger cubs fit me better (as opposed to dogs or puppies)

:) thanks for reading